Thursday, August 19, 2010

What a wacky week - so far

As we all know the beginning of the week was somewhat toasty.  I left the office and made my way peacefully to my bus stop for the treck home.  I decided to wait in the shade beside the stop to try and avoid the prospect of a heat rash.  I saw my bus coming so started making my way to the pole where I expected him to stop (seemed logical since this is where he always stops).  I looked up in time to see that the bus was not even slowing down.  I waved my arms and jumped around a bit and he finally pulled over.  As I was getting on he starts yelling at me "If you are not at the pole when I start down the road, I am not stopping for you ever again." (like this has happened before)  The heat must have gotten to me because I replied "I was at the bus stop just standing in the shade since it was 400 degrees at the pole."  " I really don't give a crap how hot it is - you wait at the pole or I don't stop it is that simple." he stated.  Imagine my surprise when I responded with "Well, first get your knotted up kickers out of you butt and open a window for a cross breeze so you can cool down and second, if you hadn't been going 60 down Howe street, it would have been easier to see me and stop."

I then calmly made my way to my seat.  However, it seems I had upset the driver who proceeded to speed up and slam on the breaks every chance he got.  At one point taking a corner so fast that not only did my purse and bag fly off the seat but so did a couple of other passengers.  The fella sitting behind me tapped me on the shoulder with " While I can fully appreciate you standing up to the driver, did you have to piss him off enough that the rest of us are wishing we had seat belts?".  I finally managed to make it home safe and sound with only a banged up wrist from almost falling during one of the breaking incidents.  I am thinking that some of these drivers do not understand the concept of the limousine service they are providing me.

Tuesday brought with it some nakedness.  Relax, not mine. So, I am walking down Georgia with 3 other lovely ladies (we were the fab 4) on our way to a wonderful lunch (Four Seasons - crab BLT mmmmm yummy) when it was brought to my attention that there were a couple of naked women standing on the corner.  They were there for PETA and had writing all over thier bodies such as "rump roast" on the bums.  I suppose I would be a bigger supporter if I happend to look like these young ladies.  Grown men in business suits began tripping over one another.  Granville street is always full of fun and interesting people.

Wednesday brought me up close and personal with the Hare Krishna folks.  I went over to The Bay to take advantage of the 'free gift' from Estee Lauder (buy $100 worth of spackel and they give you free matching eyeshadow).  On my way back to the office, it came to my attention via a noise not unlike when I stepped on my cat's tail, that the group had moved over to other side of the street - now directly in front of The Bay.  I think the drum had a hole in it and the tamborine had only one 'tambo' left.  This left it up to the singer of the group to make up for the lack of instruments.  As I stopped to give aid to someone in obvious pain, it was rather rudely pointed out that no assistance was required nor wanted.  Talk about Hairy little Krishna's.  I was forcefully subjected to pamphlets and I think they sprinkled me with what I assume is holy water (but smelled more like Mountain Dew) and pushed  aside.  Last time I try to help them.

Today, with the cooler weather, I am going to head home and perhaps turn on the stove.  It will not surprise any of my friends that I can count on one hand the number of times I have actually turned the thing on but today I feel like I am in the mood to actually cook something in the big white box taking up space in my kitchen.  I feel like perhaps lasagna should be on the menu.  Of course this means I have to get off the train at Save-On foods, hoof it around with all the other single shoppers running around in there at dinner time and then carry it all home (2 1/4 blocks - but very long blocks) in the plastic bags they give me.  This will warrant me not only snide looks from the cashier and the other shoppers in line (I live in a very eco friendly neighborhood where we recylcle cat litter) but I will be faced with sneers, sidelong glances and cat calls all the way home.  I should have brought my reusable bags to work.  Come to think of it, this seems like a lot of work and agony when I could just go home, put up my feet, and eat the rest of the ice cream before it goes bad followed by a plum to make it a balanced meal (fruit and dairy).  Tomorrow I will remember the grocery bags before I leave the house.

Have a great weekend and stay tuned.  I have some exciting stuff coming up.

H

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