You would think with all the people I know that someone would have just one single male friend that they would think I was worthy enough to be introduced to who wouldn't try to poison me, grope me (not on the first date anyway), shoot me or attempt to get me killed while dodging traffic. Honestly, I am really not that picky. Just someone nice and funny who enjoys travel, grandkids and doesn't kick dogs. That is really all I ask.
So, let me tell you about yesterday afternoon. I am waiting at the Starbucks on Granville sipping my tea. As most know, I like to arrive first to avoid possible embarrassing situations asking strange men if they are waiting for me. I was only waiting about 3 minutes when I was approached my a nice looking 50ish man asking if I was Holly. I was pleasantly surprised (and alright, I admit, hopeful). He asked if I minded if he just grabbed a coffee and then if we could walk around Granville street. Since I quite enjoy strolling about town, this sounded good.
It was going surprisingly well. He had held out his hand upon introduction (already ahead of the game), paid for his own coffee and enjoyed walking. We walked a couple of blocks before I noticed that he kept darting his eyes around. I decided that since he hadn't attempted to hug me yet, I could live with darting eyes. We walked and talked. He asked a lot of questions about what I do for a living, children, home and such. After about 30 minutes, he finally brought up what he does for a living. He is a Security Guard. Ok, I can live with that.....however, he felt compelled to explain why we had to keep walking and why we couldn't take advantage of some of the new seating along the street. It seems being a Security Guard means people you have had to either throw out of venues or otherwise call the real Police on tend to track you down and want to kill you. Not kidding.... he thinks people are out to kill him for being thrown out of a concert. This is why he never sits still and always moves along crowded streets. It now concerned me that he kept me on the outside of the sidewalk rather than the inside as my father taught me a ladie was supposed to walk.
Thankfully, we came upon a bus stop and the bus was coming. I said I had to go home and walk my dog (will buy one this weekend), hopped on the bus and left. I then had to get off the bus to catch my real one but only when he was out of sight.
I am thinking I need new friends of friends of friends. I know "just because you are paranoid doesn't mean someone isn't out to get you", but COME ON! So now I can add to my growing list - paranoia.
For those keeping track:
no drunken gun collecting
no hugging on the first meeting
I am going to spend the weekend with my granddaughters where only laughing is allowed with the occassional peeing of the bed.