Sunday, October 3, 2010

Bit of a snob

Ok, so it seems I am a bit of a snob.  Not a monetary snob but rather more of an intellectual snob. I don't consider myself a mental giant by any means but really, how does one become a 52 year old man and not know what a mutual fund is or where Disneyland is located?

So, date number 4 of Nannagramma's dating adventures started off ok enough.  We met at the Vancouver Flea Market.  It was a tad uncomfortable at first.  He has a similar appearance to my first husband and my family all knows how well that worked out.  However, due to recent remarks made to me by so called friends and family regarding my perhaps 'judgemental' ways with past dates, I decided to give it a real chance. 

We wandered the market place with me seeing nothing more than junk and he thinking he was in utpoia.  I started seeing problems.  But, I put aside my judgement and agreed to go with him to Costco and then get a bite of dinner.

Never mind the fact that he left me in Costco and I had to go back out and wait by his car in order to find him again, I really noticed  problems during dinner.

"Go ahead Holly and order a real meal.  I am paying for this so whatever you want is fine.  Don't feel obliged to 'put out' for me buying you dinner.  In fact, I will even spring for a dessert which will be the world's best massage."  This had me  looking for an escape route.  However, since I wasn't going to have to 'put out' (who says that anyway?) I ordered a big dinner.

During our dinner conversation, I discovered that there is no point to travelling outside of Canada when the great food of the world is right here already.  Isn't that the only reason to travel anyway?  (are you kidding me?)  I discovered that most of us have either gold or oil in our backyard (??).  I discovered that being a carnival worker gets you free ride passes (this is when his not working in a mine) and that's 'really really really' fun.  I discovered that there is no point in saving for retirement when the government conspiracy will just take your cash anyway.

Oh boy.  The shallow gene pool is now an aspiration.  I appear to have been shopping in the mental midget pool.

I feel like those who questioned my judgement levels should back off now.  I spent 3 hours (longest yet) - more out of curiosity I think - I wanted to hear what he was going to say next - before heading home thankful I wasn't going to have to 'put out' for a couple of fajitas.   I feel I was more than fair in giving him a chance.  Of course, those are three hours I will never get back.

Ok, I am putting the word out now - if I have any friends or family who have even the slightest bit of caring for me, please keep your eyes open for the following:

1 male between 49-55 years of age (unless you find that 80 year old millionaire orphan with a heart condition)
must be employed
at least 5'10"
must be able to read without moving his lips - bonus request - it would be nice if he reads more than pop-up books
Spelling is also a must - spelling well is a want
likes to travel
owns at least one tie
doesn't ask me how to spell my name
sense of humour
No felons please

See?  My list really isn't very long or complicated.  I think these are the kinds of things most woman want.

I am not giving up.  Somewhere out there must be at least one man with these qualities who will not feel ill when he looks at me and wants to at least go to a movie.

I will continue to keep you posted.


No comments:

Post a Comment