Thursday, November 1, 2012

I will never know if I lose my mind

Because I live each day with little pieces of my mind dribbling down the side of my neck and soon it will be all gone.

So, it has been pretty busy lately.

I decided to forgo dealing with the insurance company when I went out to my car, parked on the street, to find yet again, that some nimrod has no idea how to park.  She (I know it was a she and a discredit to my gender), came in too close, took out my side mirror and left a nice deep gash of blue and red paint along the side.  When I mentioned this to my brother, he took a look and for the first time let me know that he too has trouble parking as he was pleased to note that the red and blue gash covered up his incident with the post in the garage quite nicely.  Yeesh

 Last weekend I had Christmas.  Ok, perhaps you are thinking the mind is already lost but in fact, my family tries to get together each year before the grown-ups head off to spend the cold months staying warm in Mexico.  We had a nice dinner, lots of laughs and exchanged gifts.

We exchange names and have a $30 limit (at least that is what I thought).  My older brother had my name this year and thankfully, he is married to a wonderful woman who shops for him and signs his name.  Thank you again Angie for the spa certificate.  The $30 came into play as we all watched in wonderment as the baby of the family got spoiled.  I now have to revamp my thinking from believing that the first born was their favorite to the youngest.  The $30 limit doesn't count for him.  I want Dad to draw my name next year and I want a bike :)

After returning from the Christmas on the island, I had to pack up and make my way to the Okanagan.  It was a whirlwind 2 day adventure where I flew into Kelowna, picked up a rental car and made my way to Penticton and Kamloops before returning to Kelowna for one last meeting and the flight home. 

After my usual pat down at 8am in the airport, I made my way to my seat.  I was settled in nicely for the 1 hour flight when I was served apple juice as my beverage of choice.  We hit an air pocket.  I wore my juice.  I wore my juice while wearing my very best power suit.  They didn't go together as well as one might wish.  Upon landing, I raced to the ladies room with my suitcase to change.  I had packed one suit, two tops, nightie, two undies and my toothbrush and make-up along with my travel home comfort clothes.  Well, I thought I had packed 2 tops and my nightie.  Turns out there were still on my bed.  I had a choice - change into my comfort travel clothes or appear at the meeting in stained and sticky ones.  Either way I would lose my power.  Oy Vey.  I decided on the comfort travel clothese because there were clean and I could explain my loss of power.  With dirty, stained and sticky clothes I would just look like a slob who cannot hold onto a glass of juice.

After that meeting, the plan was for me to drive to Kamloops from Penticton and meet up with my oldest friend (that doesn't look right - she's not my OLDEST actually but she is my longest?  that doesn't look right either - sorry Brenda) for dinner or dessert - depending on the time I arrived.  Turns out 18 wheelers - every single one of them in BC, found out that I was on the road and in a hurry and decided to work against me.  What should have been perhaps 2 1/2 to 3 hours at the most turned into a 4 1/2 hour drive in the pouring rain.  I missed dessert - dinner too for that matter.

Up the next morning and off to the first appointment.  All fine and dandy.  Back to Kelowna for one more and the flight home in time to give out candy to the wee ones.  Holy crap on a cracker - the big rigs were back.  I had to pull over and contact my appointment and let them know that at this rate I could only give them 30 minutes or I would miss my flight. 

I arrived at the airport with 10 minutes to spare.  I parked the rental car, ran inside and took off my coat to put in my suitcase and hand it over to the luggage lady before commencing to AVIS to return my car.  Oh oh.  My car keys were in the pocket of my jacket.  Thank goodness that the Kelowna airport is small.  I won't repeat what I overheard the handlers say about me because I am too much of a lady.  I got the keys back, paid my bill and  was very red faced as I sprinted like OJ only to have my plane be late and I had to sit in the waiting room where I was sure everyone knew how stupid I was.  It might have been me that made the plane late if they had to dig around for my suitcase.

I was privy to one last exciting event in Kelowna that caused me a bit of concern.  The Tin Man, wearing his captains hat and identification, passed in front of me to board the plane.  My pilot was the Tin Man.  He has no heart.  Could this day get any worse?  Seems so.  It was so windy, rainy and miserable that turbulance made it a rollercoaster ride from hell all the way home.  I had to pee.  They wouldn't let me up.  The lady beside me spilled her bottle of water all over my legs.  I forgot my credit card in the car service on the way home.

I had tried to get home in time for the tricker treaters.  I love when they come around.  I was expecting a big crowd as I ran out of candy  last year by 7pm.  No one came.  The storm kept them away.  I now have $40 worth of candy sitting on my kitchen table.  I have decided to just buy bigger pants as I am determined not to waste $40.

Stay tuned - off to Toronto, Winnipeg and Regina on the 11th.  Yeeha - the life of a jetsetter.  I need to nap now.

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