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Sunday, December 19, 2010

It's going to take a lot more to embarrass me

I am still wondering how this was my fault.  I was standing - completely still - waiting for my bus home from work.  I had my earphones in and my ear muffs on.  I have taken to wearing both so that I can zone out all the "spare change" requests on my travels around the city.  I was also working on a crossword puzzle.  I was not bothering anyone at all and again, I stress, I WAS STANDING COMPLETELY STILL.

Because I was in my own zone I didn't see it coming until it happened.  I was run over and knocked into the back of the bus stop.  I was run over by a young man on a scooter.  He had 5 feet of sidewalk space but it seems he headed right for me (see earlier blog referring to freak magnate).  Not only did he run me over but then he sat there on his scooter yelling at me.  As a crowd gathered to see what was going on I felt I should launch into some sort of defence.  Because I was still in a bit of a shock, I just stood there looking at him before calmly removing my headphones and earmuffs and said " I am sorry I didn't offer you more of a challenge.  Next time I will run around the sidewalk bobbing and weaving so as to provide you with a real game and an opportunity to test your hunting skills.  Not much of a challenge for you to hit someone standing still.  Merry Christmas"  People in the crowd applauded.  He started to scream even more that I was a bitch and offensive to disabled people and should not be allowed out in public.  Well, really, he had no idea.  It takes a hell of a lot more than that to embarrass me.   It seems smiling at someone and saying Merry Christmas tend to make some people very upset.

After he went away, I put the earphones and earmuffs back in place and returned to my crossword puzzle.  I was barely settled in again when I got a tap on the shoulder from behind.  Thinking someone wanted to see if I was ok, I took the ear gear off and turned around.  Standing in front of me was a guy who asked for my spare change (obviously the ear coverings are no longer a deterant).  I politely said no.  He stood there looking at me and then said "well, you obviously have a bank card so we can go across the street while you get me some cash".  Was he kidding?  Was the ghost of Allan Funt around the corner filming me?  I said not likely.  He began to argue that I was indeed a selfish bitch.  Yeah - that's going to work.  I had already dropped $20 into the Salvation Army bin and sent my annual cheque to the United Way.  I told him to go talk to them.  He started to get more agressive and again, I seem to have attracted a crowd.  All of this happened within a 10 minute period.  It seems my freak magnate was set to full attraction.

I made it home in one piece in time to get ready to meet my friend Heather, her new boyfriend and mother for an evening out at Van Dusen gardens.  It was a beautiful evening.  The sky was clear and the air crisp.  The gardens had done a fabulous job of more than 1 million lights strung through  part of the gardens.  There were carols being sung and hot chocolate to be had while we strolled.  I was very much put in the mood of the season - even more so when I ran into Santa for a Christmas grope - not once but twice.  Made my day.  I had a great time and enjoyed meeting Heather's new beau.  Because she is my friend, I even let him give me a hug goodnight.  As readers are aware, I am not a hugger - especially with people I just met.  She is going to owe me.

After enjoying lunch with my youngest daughter on Satuday, I spent the evening in front of the fire wrapping gifts and making the traditional nuts n' bolts.  This year was a success when I only burned a small portion.  I made enough to fill the entire turkey roaster.  I found out the trick is to make the seasoning plentiful and then slowly pour the mixture over the cereals and bake them slowly in a cooler oven.  This of course is a bit contrary to my usual style of cooking - if 350 degrees is good then 450 must be better.  I stirred every 20 minutes in a 250 degree oven for 3 hours.  I think they taste pretty good and once I finish picking out all the burnt shreddies, it will be perfect.

I am almost all set for Santa - only 6 more sleeps.  I just have some stocking stuffers to get, fressh veggies to purchase and the baking of my pies and tarts.  I wanted to do them this weekend but I have no room in my wee freezer.  I will have to bake at the last minute and keep my fingers crossed as I will have no time to re-do if necessary.  I usually need to have at least two tries before I get it mostly right.  My black bottom cookies are a family favorite.

I have a date for Wednesday night.  Not sure how I feel about it since I am rather busy at the moment.  I finally agreed to dinner but we may have to eat in a hurry so I can get home to finish some last minute items.  Hopefully he won't want to order dessert.

I will keep you posted.

Cheers and ho ho ho

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